I had to send mother a note today. Jane is still not noticeably better and I wanted her see what she had done to her oldest daughter. So my mother came, together with Lydia and Kitty. My mother did find Jane to be worse than expected, at least that was what she informed Mr Bingley and the others. She does not want my sister to recover too quickly of course. Jane herself does not want to be burden and asked to be carried home, but our dear mama does not listen to that ear. The apothecary that came at the same time, agreed with our mother, unfortunately. So, at Netherfield we remain.

Mr Bingley, upon hearing my mother’s comment on Jane being too ill to be moved, was horrified at the though of Jane being taken home. That was out of the question. Mother quickly complimented on the room and the prospect of the gravelled walk outside. She even went as far as to say that Mr Bingley would never want to leave now that he was settled. Mr Bingley replied that he considered himself quite fixed at the moment, but if he did decide to leave he would be off in a hurry, as always when he did something.

When I said that that was exactly what I would have thought of him, Mr Bingley and I began discussing the fact that I like to study people’s characters, much to my mother’s dismay of course. She was mortified when I commented said I understood Mr Bingley fully. Mr Darcy threw himself into the discussion by saying that the country did not provide enough subjects to study, since our society is so unvarying. I disagree. People alter themselves so much that I think I will be amused for the rest of my life. My mother was offended by Mr Darcy thinking so little of our society. Then my mother went on and on about how she thought the country was much more pleasant than London, and was very proud to announce that we dine with four and twenty families. I thought I would die of mortification. I could see the looks exchanged between Mr Darcy and Miss Bingley.

My mother can never keep her mouth shut, and often embarrass me and my sisters. Today’s topic of conversation was Charlotte Lucas and her plainness in favour of Jane’s beauty and a suitor had written Jane some verses, but not made her an offer. I think poetry sends people away, but when I aired this thought, Mr Darcy said that he had always considered poetry to be the food of love. When I said that everything nourishes what is strong already, but if it was only an infatuation, I was sure a good sonnet would starve it entirely away. At that Mr Darcy smiled one of his very rare smiles. And it was like the sun broke through thick clouds on a rainy day. It quite transformed his features and made him a very handsome man, indeed.

The moment was broken by Lydia who reminded Mr Bingley about his promise to host a ball. He promised that when Jane was well Lydia would be the one to name the date for the ball. I have never seen my sister so happy, nor my mother so proud.

As soon as mother and my sisters left, I returned to Jane. I can only imagine what discussion is going on in the sitting room now…

Jane is still very ill. I have been at her side all day. The Bingley siblings have taken turns to sit with their patient. I have not been able to leave her more than a couple of minutes at a time. Her fever has not gone down.

It is only now in the evening that I have been able to leave her to herself. She has finally fallen asleep, and seems to be sleeping soundly, so I felt I could leave her. I found the residents in the drawing room playing cars. They offered me a seat, but I felt like I did not have the want to play. I decided on a book instead. Miss Bingley made fun of me and blamed me of despising cards, which is not true, and said that I was a great reader and took little pleasure in anything else. She is really getting on my nerves! I pointed out that I was not a good reader and took pleasure in lots of things. Mr Bingley, bless him, came to my rescue and stated that I surely took pleasure in nursing my sister to health.

Then the discussion turned to the library at Mr Darcy’s estate, Pemberley. Mr Darcy claimed that they had collected novels to that library for generations and ought to have a great selection of books. I found that I had problems with concentrating on my reading, listening in on the discussion regarding books and a want of Mr Bingley’s future house being half as nice as Pemberley. I learned that Miss Darcy is the same height as me. I was a little surprised that he compared his sister to me! It vexed Miss Bingley, but she praised Georgiana instead, telling us how accomplished she was.

Mr Bingley commented on how accomplished all women seemed to be. They sing, dance, embroids and plays instruments. His sister did not agree, however, nor his friend. And that started the discussion what a accomplished woman was supposed to know. And I could not sit in silence any longer. Mr Darcy has very high standards on what a woman ought to know. He claimed he knew not half a dussin truly accomplished women. After hearing what he considered a woman ought to know I was surprised he knew any. I never saw such a woman! Miss Bingley and Mrs Hurst said they knew many a accomplished woman and called me unjuste. After that they returned to their game and I back to Jane.

Picture borrowed from fanpop.

My poor Jane is ill. I got a note this morning from Netherfield. Mother was very pleased with herself, of course. I set out to Netherfield as soon as possible. My father wanted me to take the carriage, but the weather was too nice and a little walk never hurt anyone. For once my mother showed some proriety and was horrified that I would even consider walking to Netherfield, just think of how I would look when I arrived. I said that the only person that I wanted to see was Jane, and she most definitely does not care how I look.

Unfortunately the first person I happened upon when I reached Netherfield was Mr Darcy. I could see my reflexion in his shocked eyes. He was very surprised that I had walked all the way from Longbourn. But he was kind enough to escort me to my sister.

Poor Jane! She is ill indeed, too ill to be moved. I shall remain here until she has recovered. I keep to her room for the time being. Mr Bingley is amiable, but his sisters do not care for me, though they are very concerned about Jane’s well being. What Mr Darcy thinks I do not know. I can only imagine what they say about me and my appearance… I hope I can hide in Jane’s room as much as possible.

Picture borrowed from Fanpop

Oh, my mother is the worst of mothers! Do you what she had done? She has sent Jane off to Netherfield on Nelly! Even though it looked like rain. Now it is pouring down and Jane is going to be soaking wet when she arrives and not at all fit to call on anybody. Luckily the gentlemen are to dine in Meryton with the officers, so  Jane will not have to embarrass herself in front of Mr Bingley at least.

It all started at lunch when Jane received a letter from Miss Bingley. In the letter she was asked to dinner since the gentlemen were to dine out. That was why mother would not let Jane have the carriage. She wanted Jane to be caught in the rain and not be able to go home before she had met Mr Bingley.

My poor Jane. I do hope she is all right. I cannot believe my mother, to put her through such humiliation! It is embarrassing. I am angry with my father too, for letting my mother have her way. He who usually is on our side when it comes to mother and her schemes…

Mr Darcy is really beginning to get on my nerves! I do not know how to act when he is around anymore. Everywhere I go, there he is!

We were at the Lucases this evening. I was trying to convince Colonel Forster to host a ball when I see that Mr Darcy is standing not far from us, listening. When he noticed that I had seen him, he came closer, still silent. I could not let that pass, but asked him if I hade expressed myself exceptionally well in my speech. Mr Darcy said that I had, especially since it is a subject of which young women tend to speak of often. He is right, of course. Then Charlotte forced me to sit down by the piano forte. Mary soon took my place. But instead of playing one of her usual concertos she was persuaded to play something more danceable. Kitty and Lydia danced with all the officers that were attending.

I did not feel like dancing at all so when the youngsters started dancing, I went to sit down. When I passed Sir William Lucas and Mr Darcy, Sir William wondered why I was not dancing. He told Mr Darcy that I was an excellent partner. “You cannot refuse to dance, I am sure, when so much beauty is before you,” Sir Lucas said. Mr Darcy did of course ask me to dance, but I was determined not to dance. And most certainly not with him! Sir William tried to persuade me to dance, meaning that it would be an honour to dance with someone that seldom danced. Mr Darcy was all politeness and did show some good breeding for once. But I had already decided against it, and with as much politeness as he had asked me, I declined. And if I am not mistaken he did seem a bit disappointed. It did give me some pleasure.

Picture borrowed from Fanpop

The interest of the newcomers seem to have cooled down now. I think Jane and her Mr Bingley is the talk of the town at the moment. Bingely is in love. Anyone can see that. Although his friend and sisters do not seem too pleased by his choice of lady. Jane is of course pleased with the attentions. According to her Bingley is everything a young man ought to be. And I do understand her. You cannot find a more pleasing man. I am happy for her. Charlotte think she needs to encourage him more. We who know Jane, can see that she is very likely to fall in love, but she is not the passionate type. Besides, she has not known him for little more than a week. How is she supposed to know how she feels? It is not like they have been alone at all.

Colonel Forster and his regiment has arrived in Meryton. Lydia and Kitty fancy themselves in love with all the officers. A man in regimentals is dashing, to be sure. But they do not have to run around them like love sick puppies. It is embarrassing! They even wear red capes to honour them! I am beginning to worry. Mother is on their side of course, she has a soft spot for officers. I am glad I take after my father.

Mr Darcy is as he ever was. Not that I care. But his presence makes me uneasy. I have noticed that he likes to study us. His dark eyes is haunting me. It is unnerving. If he could only be more like his friend…

Picture borrowed from BBC.

Charlotte was here today. We usually take turns to go visit each other. I do not mind the walk, but Charlotte preceded me today. Yesterday’s events were of course the topic of conversation. I have still not entirely recovered, but I can laugh at it now. Mr Darcy is not a favourite in town either, despite his fortune and breeding. Nobody has gotten a word out of him, the only times he opened his mouth was if asked a direct question. It is fascinating that such a man can be friends with Mr Bingley. They are really each other’s opposites. Both in looks and in mind. Bingley is a happy fellow, open and amiable. Darcy is quiet, dark and melancholy and there is nothing amiable about him. Bingley’s sisters do not seem too happy about Bingley’s choice of habitation. I am sure they would rather be in town or in some more fashionable part of the country.

Sure, the rich may have the luxury of being proud and haughty. I guess I could forgive Mr Darcy his pride, if he had not hurt mine. If I am lucky I will not have to speak to him ever again. Unfortunately his friend seems much in love with my sister, and I will not be so lucky.

Jag har då aldrig blivit så illa bemött i hela mitt liv! Jag är nästan för arg för att skriva, men jag känner att jag måste få ur mig allt.

Kvällen började bra, många roliga danser och trevliga kavaljerer. Sedan kom DE. Mr Bingley med sällskap. Bingely hade med sig sina två systrar, en Miss Caroline Bingley och Mrs Louisa Hurst med man och en Mr Darcy. Mr Bingley var älskvärdheten själv. Väldigt stilig så klart. Det som sagts om honom hade verkligen inte överdrivits. Hans systrar är väldigt eleganta, vackra klänningar, men båda verkade hellre vilja vara någon annanstans än var de var just nu. Med näsan i vädret såge de ner på alla i salongen.

Så kommer vi till Mr Darcy. Även han blev presenterad för oss tillsammans med Mr Bingley. Artig och korrekt, ja visst. Rik så det förslår. Men så stolt att han gick utan att ens ursäkta sig. Mr Bingley var besvärad över sin väns beteende. Förvisso kan min mor beskyllas för att vara alldeles för påstridig igen. Mannen sa faktiskt att han inte uppskattade dans. Mor kunde så klart ha låtit det vara, men i vanlig ordning var hon tvungen att försöka få som hon ville. Men icke, Mr Darcy försvann. Väldigt stilig, visst, men inte speciellt väluppfostrad.

Mr Bingley hade bara ögon för Jane. Jag är inte förvånad. Hon är ju känd för att vara traktens skönhet. Vem kan säga nej till henne? Hon är älskvärd, vacker och har ett sådant milt temperament att jag inte tror att hon skulle kunna göra en fluga förnär. Bingley dansade nästan bara med henne. En dans med mig, och sedan en med Charlotte, och sedan var det bara Jane som dög.

Nu till varför jag är så upprörd! Mr Darcy! Vilken fruktansvärd man! Nog för att han säkert inte trodde att jag hörde hans konversation med Bingley, med det ger honom i alla fall inte rätten att prata så om mig! Jag satt ner en stund för det inte fanns nog med kavaljerer, förutom att jag redan dansat i princip varje dans och behövde lite vila. Bingley och Darcy stog en bit bort. Bingley försökte övertala Darcy att dansa. I sammanhanget med huruvida det fanns några vackra kvinnor närvarande. Jag kom på tal. Vet ni vad Darcy svarar? Trots att jag inte sitter mer än några meter bort? “Hon ser väl bra ut, men är inte vacker nog att locka mig.” Jag trodde jag skulle sätta vinet i halsen! Bingley sa emot, men Darcy undrade varför han skulle ta sig an någon som ratats av andra män. Bingley kallade honom snobbig och sedan fick jag nog. Jag var tvungen att berätta för någon om vad jag hört.

Tack och lov för Charlotte. Min söta, omtänksamma, förståndiga vän, Charlotte. Hon finns alltid där och kan lugna ner mig när mitt humör stormar för mycket. Hon lyckades få mig att se det komiska i situationen. Darcy gör bara sig själv illa.

Jag kan i alla fall lova en sak. Jag kommer aldrig dansa med Mr Darcy!

I have never been treated worse in my life! I am almost too upset to write, but I need to get it out!

The night started well, many pleasant dances and partners. Then THEY arrived. Bingley with company. With him he brought his two sisters, a Miss Caroline Bingley and a Mrs Louisa Hurst and husband and then a Mr Darcy. Mr Bingley was so amiable. Very handsome, of course. What has been said about him was by no means exaggerated. His sisters are very elegant, beautiful gowns, but both seemed to wish they were elsewhere. Haughtily they looked down at everyone in the assembly room.

Then we have Mr Darcy. He was introduced to us together with Mr Bingley. Polite and correct in his airs, sure. Richer than his friend. But he left without even excusing himself. Mr Bingley was uncomfortbly left with us, embarrased over his friend’s behaviour. Of course my mother’s behavior was not much better, she was coming on too strong again. The man did say he did not care for dancing. Mother could of course just let that drop, but no, my mother had to press the matter further. As an answer Mr Darcy left. Handsome to be sure, but very illmannered.

Mr Bingley only had eyes for Jane. I am not surprised. She is the beauty of the county. Who could say no to her? She is so amiable, beautiful, with such a mild temper I do not think she would hurt a fly. Bingley danced almost all night with her. One dance with me, then one with Charlotte, but after that only Jane.

Now to my being upset. Mr Darcy! Horrible man! I grant him that he did not know I was overhearing his conversation with Mr Bingley, but it still does not give him the right to speak like that of me! I was sitting down for once, partners were scarce, and since I had dance every dance I really needed to get off my feet. Bingley and Darcy were standing a few feet away from me. Bingley tried to persuade Darcy to dance. Discussing the presence of many a handsome woman. Bingley took me as an example. And what does Darcy answered? Even though I am just a few yards away? “She is tolerable I suppose, but not handsome enough to tempt me.” I thought I was going to choke on my wine! Bingley tried to object, but Darcy wondered why he should give consequence to someone who was slighted by other men. Bingley called him a snob and I was thankful for that. I left my seat in search of someone to tell!

Thank the Lord for Charlotte. My sweet, sensible friend, Charlotte. She is always around to keep my temper in check when I need it. She managed to make me see the funny side of the situation. Darcy is only hurting himself.

I can safely say that I will never dance with Mr Darcy!

They have arrived. Mr Bingley and his friends are here. I can scarcely believe it. I had almost thought he was not for real, what with all that has been said about him. It is more as if he is a hero in a novel than a real person.

Apparently we cannot avoid being acquainted now. My father had been to call on him after all. Mother is besides herself with joy since we are to have the pleasure of being introduced to the company from Netherfield tomorrow. They are to attend the ball in Meryton! The house is buzzing with excitement… So much to be done, frocks to be mended, shoes to be polished…

Mary is seated by the piano, trying to learn a new song for tomorrow. We all try, in our own way, to make her give up her attempts. But she is resistant. Practice makes perfect, or so they say. But not in this case. Mary Bennet is a lost cause. I am not saying that I am a good player, because I am not, but I do not flaunt my lack of talent in front of everybody we know. Well, as long as she does not sing, we shall be fine…

Now we have a bit more information about who has rented Netherfield Park. Apparently his name is Bingley and brings, according to my sisters, a large company. Lydia says there is too many ladies. Mother has tried to persuade my father to call on him, but father only evades the qustion. I think he is only teasing he. But she is so obstinate. There is now way of persuading her, the more she tries, the more he refuses. Mother has resign to never hear another word of Mr Bingley since we are never to be acquainted with him, thanks to our dear father. I am not sure whether to laugh or cry.

It is quite fascinating that one man can cause such a stir up before even entering the county. I almost feel sorry for him. Such high expactations to live up to. Poor man…

I have to admit that I am quite curios of Bingley and his friends. It is hard not to be. Everybody is talking about him… tomorrow we will see…